lara

i know this isn't craft related, which is what i try to keep this blog soley about but:



Rest In Peace my sweet baby girl.
I don't know why god took her, she was only five years old.

I came home from work yesterday to find her lifeless on the floor. All stretched out, maybe it was a seizure? There was no other sign of anything around her, no blood, no vomit, no feces. She was just laying there.

My friend Brian buried her for me in my backyard.
I couldn't say good-bye.
My last memory I want to be kissing her sweet warm forhead before I left for work.
I loved her so much i never took my time with her for granted.
There was not one day i didn't kiss her goodnight or kiss her goodbye in the morning.
I made sure every night we laid together on the couch and watched TV.
She loved laying on my chest and putting her chin next to my neck.
That was the best feeling on earth - no matter how depressed or anxious i was, listening to her breathing and sighing and feeling that slightly damp warm breath on my shoulder and neck comforted me.

In the morning she would stretch out on the bed next to me and roll over and i would kiss her tummy up and down and it was so soft and smooth and warm and smelled just like her.

It might be weird to other people, but i just loved smelling her. Every day I would just pick her up and smell the top of her forhead. I was the only person she let do that.

I dont understand why she died.
She wasn't acting sick.
She wasn't being listless or not eating.

god i will miss her.
my heart aches like it never has.
she was my life.